Posted 1 month ago
Posted 1 month ago
Posted 1 month ago
Posted 2 months ago
Posted 2 months ago
Posted 2 months ago

beartier:

my mom said ‘Hitler was a penis potato’

and i have never been more confused in my life

until she looked at me like i was stupid and said ‘dictator… penis potato… god its like you’re not even my daughter’

i am so fucking done

Posted 2 months ago

ayodeejay:

ohhmaiko:

cunt1:

imma fucking rip ur face off bitch

i like how the other boy is just like “well shit son”

omg

(Source: sorters)

Posted 2 months ago
Posted 2 months ago
Posted 3 months ago

pudgiebudgie:

rumpledleathertrousers:

preparetobemildlyentertained:

brain-confetti:

remanth:

semolavanpelt:

Every woman has mastered this. We are actually born with this skill.

You level up when you can do it with long sleeves

I was the only girl on an all-boys varsity soccer team. I had to change on the bus during away games because I didn’t have a locker room at other schools. I was not uncomfortable with that, actually. I did what I had to.

But one day I noticed that like three guys who were seniors were just staring at me as I did this and I must have shot them a dirty look because one of them (who is actually a family friend) was like “I’m sorry, I don’t mean to stare, but we’re still trying to figure out how the hell girls do that” and I just felt bad. They just want to get their girlfriend’s bra off without losing an eye and we can remove the whole thing like fucking wizards

i told my mom about this post and she went ‘wait, you can do it with long sleeves? um, i’ll be right back’

Hey I can bust that shit out through two shirts and a hoodie DOES THAT MAKE ME A GODDESS?

Yes, yes it does. You should make a how to guide.

(Source: targaryend)

Posted 5 months ago
Posted 5 months ago
Posted 5 months ago

Let’s go on a road trip together. Just you and me.

Let’s go on a road trip together. Just you and me.

(Source: monstersbehindmasks)

Posted 5 months ago
Posted 5 months ago